Xeno vs Xenu
Mon, Nov 23, 2009 by Claire Connelly
It’s the first sign of the apocalypse, when religious prophets can’t turn a profit from their followers.
You mellow headed moderates may argue “oh, he’s just concerned for people’s welfare. Won’t somebody please think of the children!”, but do not let your fair-minded fundamentalism mislead you.
Behind this veneer of balance and compromise there lies a darker truth.
Oh it may seem harmless at first, but what starts out as just innocent accusations of exploitation and abuse may result in an impoverished God!
Today it’s the Church of Scientology, tomorrow it could be your local Mosque, or Synagogue, or Buddhist temple, and before you know it tax-happy Xenophon will be taxing the legitimate religions too!
Just imagine the horror: Hillsong or the Catholic Church bereft of funds, forced to stand on street corners, shivering in their itchy trousers, holding signs proclaiming “the end is nigh” scribbled on the backs of cardboard boxes with stolen pens who instead of being ordained in their ministries, are forced to live like beggars because their last payment was deposited in the House of Parliament instead of the House of the Lord.
Should the Australian government really be taxing God? Because that is what they want to do.
Do you really want that on your conscience Australia?
Do you?
What is this, the Middle Ages? I mean helloooo – poverty is so last century! The only people who take a vow of poverty these days are nuns, and everyone knows they don’t count !
(Pfft! Women.)
Australia, it is our responsibility as decent God fearing people to stand up for our tax exempt religious institutions’ right to impart enlightenment.
Is it too much to ask that we part with a generous portion of our income in return?
Well Mr Xenophon, Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes, Mr. religious-morality-this, and God-is-a-tax-evader-that – you are impinging on the rights of the prophets, the chosen, the glorified, and the godlike to accept outrageous offerings from people who are merely looking for self-improvement and meaning.
Religions have been making lots and lots of money from their followers for thousands and thousands of years, (how do you think the Vatican was built for Christ sake?)
Well, yes – technically it was for Christ’s sake, but nonetheless – why are you trying to change precedence?
I mean honestly, what good is there in being able to convey the voice of God, if it doesn’t come with constitutionally guaranteed tax exemptions?
Get with the times man! Everyone does it. Even a seat in my synagogue requires a yearly fee because: enlightenment requires sacrifice.
Are you suggesting that I risk redemption by withholding the donation that was rightly theirs in the first place?
And now not only does our charity get called into question, but the Church of Scientology might actually have to pay taxes?
And why? Because they believe in aliens?
Believing in aliens is no more ludicrous than believing in an invisible and benevolent force that controls the entire universe, past, present and future!
Shun the non-believer! (Shun! Shun!)
Don’t think we don’t see what you are doing, Xeno.
Don’t think that the bizarre similarity between your surname and that of your opponent is the only coincidence in this little sparring match.
You criticize religious institutions for turning a profit from their followers but you just want a slice of the pie!
It is no more your place to question the complex inner dwellings of Scientology, than it is to question the love Catholic priests show for alter boys, or Hillsong record label owners penchant for Rolls Royce’s, or Buddhist monks to pave their temples in gold with massive sitting deities, or the right a Rabbi has to run a legitimate cocaine, drug, and prostitution ring.
These are chosen people Xenophon! Leave it alone! These are Gods people, and by God they know what they are doing.
And who are we, mere public servants, to question that?
Have some faith man!
Unlike you, real leaders believe in financial risk! And so should we!
And as for this whole mind control accusation, I don’t know what you are getting your knickers in a knot about.
Mind control is a central tenet of religion.
What is religion but the assertion that God and religious clerics know what is better for us than we do?
And now you are trying to take that away from us too!
It’s lunacy and liberalism run mad I tell you!
Without tax exemptions, Australia would be poorer for it.
No longer would our buses, overpasses, billboards & televisions be the bearers of the Good Word – those Jesus is LIFE ads would be the first to go!
Next it will be Carols by Candle-Light, then Christmas & Hanukah, and before you know it there will be no religious holidays at all!
Humbug!
Do you want that Australia?
DO YOU?
Write to Mr Xenophon today and tell him that he is going TO HELL if he makes those who believe in cuddly aliens rather than the lord almighty (blessed be he) pay taxes.
Xenu the Almighty
c/o Nick Xenophon
212 Grenfell Street,
ADELAIDE,
SA, 5000
It’s a slippery slope.
A SLIPPERY slope.
As an avid atheist I have no qualms with people beleiving what they want and hell If their thought of choice is a tax exempt status with the government so be it, even though all these churches preach love, unity and tolerence and then spend all the money on themselves instead of helping gods lesser and forgotten children.
Although I must say you should wiki "bokononism" if there was a religion I'm willing to follow that would be it.
But Scientology, well it all comes down to that religion Vs cult argument again doesn't it.
Aliens need loving too Rayray!
I have been searching for this, was not on the samepage in search as it was last week when I first saw it. Anyway, thank God for search history!